translation of a heart, pt i

part i;
of endless chases in my sleep
of you

.. i pull you down to me again,
in a wish
made at night

to a chain built from thoughts..

can your patience
untangle me?

decipher my world
for me
once more..

i never meant for it to turn
so vexed..
so complicated...


.. i wrap you around me again,
in a dream
old as time

to an ocean filled with words..

can you keep me
from drifting?

bring reason to all
i can't
understand..

i never meant to lose my mind
to the melting sun
inside your mouth...

c. January, 2001

the green cargo note pad
onboard USS Bonhomme Richard
Aft Main Machinery Room

underway, Pacific Ocean
curated at TBNH

recurrent memento

you remind me of soft breezes and clear waters..
of a warm ray of sunlight
that reaches back to my very beginning,
to that moment when my soul
was born..

of a chance that there could still be
someone
out there
with a grasp so powerful
that can shake me to the very core..
with one look from her eyes..
with one word
from her lips..

of that old collection
of blithe and careless afternoons
that seems faint
and never meant to return...

of a vast, endless field
covered in soft knee-high grass
where i once ran
long
long ago..

you remind me of songs everlasting,
of thoughts that have never left me,
of shining beacons in the night..

of what i've always known
is the most daring proof
why i came
to this world..

May 25, 2010

8:01am - 1:47pm

via Note Everything & TBNH

direct transcript

thinness

dreamt of you again...
you were standing there, at my doorstep...
eyes afire,
blood boiling,
heart racing,
i held you near
and devoured you
kiss by kiss...

i wished of not waking up...
of not letting you escape my grasp...
of avoiding losing you to the morning sun...

tried keeping my eyelids shut...
tried finding you once more under these sheets...

but gone you are...
as gone you were...
as gone you've been...

but just as well...
my dreams of you...
seem here to stay...

night after dreadful night...
dream after painful dream...

as you vanish...

from our intertwined fingers...

into the thinness of air...